


Burn Up

by orphan_account



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: 2012 Summer Olympics, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-07
Updated: 2013-02-07
Packaged: 2017-11-28 11:44:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/674027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I was able to keep my focus in training, which was going very well, but off the field, it was too much. One night, I broke down in tears. But after that I adopted my old attitude: f–k it. I’m not here to please people." - Hope Solo</p>
            </blockquote>





	Burn Up

The hotel room lights were off when Kelley crept inside. She was all but tiptoeing. There wasn't an exact curfew for players, but she did feel a little guilty when she closed the door louder than she had intended. Hope had left dinner early and could have crashed already.  
  
It was as cold inside the room as she had expected. They were in between weather. Which around here seemed to mean somewhere between cold and damp at all times. _Wasn't it the Summer Olympics?_ For hotels it meant neither the heater or the air conditioner seemed to work properly and neither were a priority to fix.   
  
"Just like home," Hope had said as she pulled out a hoodie from her bag as though she always expected Seattle weather wherever she went. Despite getting crap for it, Hope wore a scarf in Florida so maybe she wasn't the best measurement for the weather.  
  
Hope wasn't there though. Her bed was still made and her bags still zipped up where she left them. She must have gone out.  
  
With no reason to be quiet anymore Kelley turned on the lights, took her time in the shower, and watched a little bit of television. When she thought of it she looked at the door. Hope was a night owl, but usually the type camped out in bed with a book.  
  
 _// Where's my fav roommate? //_  
  
Kelley sent the text and watched the news for a while.  
  
Olympic headlines. The swimmers were doing well. She flipped absently through unfamiliar channels. She paused when she heard Hope's name. Were they still talking about PEDs?

She didn't wait to find out and shut the television off. Luckily Hope wasn't here to see that. She never said it bothered her, but she was still human. If you looked closely at least.  
  
She could hear some teammates in the hallway returning late to their rooms. They all passed the door and didn't stop. Not Hope then, she thought sleepily. Not really thinking it through, she grabbed her phone in the dark and messaged Carli.  
  
 _// Is Hope with you? She's not answering her phone.  //_  
  
Five minutes ticked off. Carli was probably asleep already.

She wished she could take back the message. Now Carli would ask her over breakfast what that had been about. Somehow "I had a bad feeling" didn't seem like anything she wanted to share with Carli. Some excuse would come to her. Maybe she'd turn it around on Carli. Carli was very easy to tease. Especially about Hope.  
  
With that thought she turned over in bed and let herself relax. There was something about a travel day that sucked the energy out of you. Hope was just out late. She was practically a saint during tournaments. No drinking. All business. The Olympic village and all it's media circus was well south of them. If they made it to the final it would be crazy. Right now it almost felt like any other game abroad. It didn't, but that's what she told herself.  
  


\----

  
Hope knew some shops would be open still around dinner time so she left early enough to make it to one particular shop in time. She had a thing for candles at the moment. Or maybe she had finally bought enough bracelets and necklaces and buying the occasional candle she could burn up instead of accumulate to infinity seemed functional. Conservative. Maybe just destructive.  
  
Leaving the store, sack in hand, Hope hesitated as she turned back to the road that would lead to her hotel. Instead she decided to grab whatever cozy mystery the little bookshop next door would have. She had brought some of her regular books to read, but she wasn't in the mood for Atlas Shrugged. Sherlock seemed more topical. Mittsy usually let her quietly steal a copy from her stash but since Mittsy bought a Kindle it wasn't as easy to share books.  
  
The bookstore turned out to be mostly full of bestsellers and magazines. Touristy despite the fact it was in a group of buildings probably two hundred years old and deserved a little more local culture. Even here there were Olympic stuffed toys and the cover of magazines were full of sports coverage.  
  
She tried to avoid as much of that stuff as possible, but her eye caught her own name as would be natural to do. The words that followed didn't make any sense. She looked at the title. A local rag more or less. Her stomach didn't drop until she saw it on something more official.  
  
She didn't buy anything. The sack of candles she held were as good as forgotten. Her hand found her phone in her back pocket. She instinctively wanted to text her mom. Whitney. Adrian. Maybe not Adrian. Her face flushed in the damp, Seattle-like weather.  
  
The screen didn't come on at her touch. She hadn't charged her phone after using it nearly all the drive into town. She rarely felt like chucking her phone, but right then she could have sent it flying.  
  
Instead she pulled her hood up over her head and started walking further into town. She wasn't sure where she was headed. She wanted to be around normal people. Somewhere there weren't Olympic logos sewn, pressed, or glued on to everything. Just people going quietly about their lives. She walked for a long time in the rain before heading back.  
  


\----

  
Kelley opened her eyes to darkness. Her ears rang with that distinct feeling some sound had woken her up.

Whatever she dreamt up had vanished with awareness though. What remained was a dark room of a hotel she'd never stay at long enough to get familiar with.  
  
Her nose was cold, but otherwise the bed was thankfully warm. She shifted a little bit and pulled the blanket up far enough to warm her nose but so she could still breathe. She never had trouble going back to sleep when she woke up on the road like this, but she hated being cold.  
  
From across the small room she heard what could only be described as an attempt of a dignified sniffle. Either that or someone was halfway finished smothering herself with a pillow. She listened for a moment as it continued. Unmistakable now. What to do about it wasn't though.  
  
Kelley didn't know if it was the right thing to do, but it wasn't in her nature to leave someone alone when they were clearly hurting. She was halfway out of bed when the cold hit her and she was fully awake. No going back. She spanned the gap between the beds and found her mouth moving before her head had caught up.  
  
"Hope?" The form curled on the bed froze for a moment. Even in the near darkness she could see the blanket was kicked off. If Hope could curl up any tighter she would disappear. There was plenty of space on the small bed as a result.  
  
The darkness at least spared them both some dignity. Hope hadn't responded, but she hadn't lashed out either so Kelley let instinct rule the day and squeezed onto the bed. Hope's back faced her and she had to lean over it to see her friend better.  
  
Part of the pillow she put her hand on was damp. She reached over and placed her other hand on Hope's shoulder and gave it what she hoped was a comforting squeeze. Hope was wearing a hoodie that was soaked through. Kelley thought about what to say. Should she get Carli?  
  
Hope wasn't someone who liked anyone in her business. Usually you didn't even know something was wrong until there would be a phone call and she'd leave camp early to rush to the hospital. From what Kelley had heard that was the unfortunate normal. She'd awkwardly accept a few hugs while packing her bags and would vanish for a while.  
  
The next time you saw her she would be her old self again. You never got the between moments when everything wasn't ok. Fierce on the field and a little quiet, a little dorky, off. She never ever talked about her personal life.  
  
Kelley instinctively shifted closer, reaching around to brush hair away from her damp face. It was too dark to see her friend's expression, but just brushing against her could tell her how tense she was.  
  
"What happened, Hope?" Instead of calming her down her question seemed to reignite everything.  
  
If making her cry more was the goal it seemed to work. She found herself saying stupid things like "better out than in" and whatever else came from _Grandma O'Hara's Book for Soothing Sick Grandkids_. Eventually Hope just seemed to get tired. She rubbed her back absently, feeling the tension drop.  
  
"Can I get you a kleenex?" This might be the worst attempt at comforting in history. But it was all of what, two in the morning?  
  


\----

  
There must have been kleenex on the night stand somewhere because Kelley grabbed what ended up being a wad and most of the pieces made it over to Hope who handled it from there.  
  
Kelley was busying herself with the blanket that had gathered at the end of the bed. Most of what she did was just busy work to give them both a moment, Hope figured. There wasn't enough moments to fix this. Her mind was a jumble. She didn't want to think about what had just happened or what would likely happen.  
  
She was exhausted and there wasn't any place to retreat to. Worse, she felt sick. Maybe that long walk she took through town in the drizzle was a mistake. _You think, Hope?_  
  
"Thanks." It was the first thing Hope had said and the attack of shyness that followed it was overwhelming for a moment.    
  
"Hey, it's ok. There must have been a reason for it." Everyone liked Kelley. Kelley liked everyone. Or she assumed she must since she seemed to like Hope. It was easy to be around her. Hope couldn't say that for most people.  
  
Maybe that's why she let herself talk. What came out was a disjointed account of magazine headlines, celebrity scandals, and the logistical impossibility of getting people past Chinese security at the village. She had started off mad. The more she talked the crazier it sounded. What they wrote about her was insane. After all that happened the last eighteen months, a list she rarely itemized for the fear it would crush her, it was this story that kept her up at night?  
  
"I don't know why I'm so upset," she finally admitted. "I've never been happier." It was true. In a strange way she was happy just to be there. With these people. Any threat to that physically hurt.  
  
"I think you have a fever," Kelley put a cold hand to her forehead that trailed down her cheek and stayed there a lot longer than necessary. Hope held very still. Kelley didn't seem to notice her reaction to that. She tutted about her appearance, the wet clothes she still wore, how late she stayed out.  
  
"You can't stay in that." Kelley began tugging at her hoodie and between the two of them they got the cumbersome thing off. Hope was wearing just a black bra on underneath it, but when the blanket was pulled up it was already warmer than she had been before. The wet jeans they didn't bother with.  
  
"Now you won't get pneumonia." It would have been embarrassing had it been someone else. Kelley acted like this was completely normal. "Anymore deathbed confessions I should know about?"  
  
"How long do you have?" Hope didn't mean to sound funny, but everything in her life seemed to be tinged with dark humor.  
  
"Make some room, crazy girl." Kelley answered, sliding into space she made when she lifted up the blanket. It was going to be a long night.  
  


\----

  
Kelley opened her eyes to early morning light coming through the curtains. She could have kept sleeping if her phone hadn't started vibrating on the nightstand. She went to grab it only to find she couldn't move. There was bare arm thrown over her and a comfortable weight pressed against her back that suggested - _shit!_  
  
"Hey," Hope said behind her ear. Of course she would have woken up too.  
  
The phone kept vibrating. Hope reached over her and went for it, but could just get fingertips on it. She managed to knock it onto the floor. In "Don't Touch the Lava" rules it was lost to them forever. Hope gave up on it and sank back in bed.  
  
"I hope that wasn't anything important," she said dryly.  
  
"Feel better?" Kelley asked as casually as possible. She turned, arm bent to prop up her head as she looked at her friend.

Hope looked sleepy, but otherwise perfect if it were possible a bad case of bedhead from sleeping with wet hair could be called perfect. They had the blanket pulled up again. It took the edge off the weirdness.  
  
In fact, the only reason why this wasn't weirding her out was the fact that Hope, the most reserved person on the team, didn't seem bothered in the slightest. After bawling your eyes out and opening up the night before perhaps this was nothing. _Or maybe this is just how Hope is around the people close to her._  
  
"Look, I'm sorry about -" Hope started to say. They were either laying comfortably close or uncomfortably close depending on how you looked at it. Kelley was trying not to think about it at all. "I was going to say I was sorry, but I'm not. Thanks for talking to me last night. I never know when I'll, well, let's just say I'm glad it was you. You're a good listener."  
  
"You were there for me first," Kelley said as if needing an explanation. It was true. Hope had been the first to support her when there were doubts she could cut it as a defender. Most of the doubts came from Kelley herself.  
  
"You made that easy," Hope after a pause. Now she sounded shy.  
  
That seemed to be the cue to leave and it was Hope's bed after all. Kelley threw the covers off and moved to get up just as she remembered Hope was wearing next to nothing. Hope seemed to remember that at the same moment because her face went red.  
  
Just then the door flew open and Carli burst in. Kelley immediately thought of the text message she forgot she had sent. Her phone had been going off and she never checked it. Carli must have tried to respond and came to see for herself when no one was answering. This was Carli though. Carli was easy to mess with. She believed anything and was always expecting to be pranked. Apparently Hope had the same thought.  
  
"Knock next time, Carli. You could have been interrupting something." Hope's demeanor had changed. A wall had gone up. What had been a look of panic turned into a mischievous staredown with Carli. Hope knew how to go all in.  
  
"Dammit, you two-" Carli started. She wasn't exactly buying it, but she knew she didn't always get jokes.  
  
Before she could finish Syd walked into the room, took one look at the bed, and yelled "Puppy pile!" and jumped in with a squeal. Hope and Kelley had to make room for the younger player who seemed oblivious to everything going on.  
  
Abby was standing in the doorway watching. Kelley wasn't sure how long she had been there but she knew she wouldn't be as distractible as Carli or Syd was.  
  
"A little rated R there, Hope?" Abby said in a tone that was impossible to read. Kelley locked eyes with Abby for a moment. Kelley wasn't a good liar. There wasn't anything to lie about though, she told herself. Abby didn't seem convinced.  
  
"Nowhere you haven't been before," Hope answered in the same tone Abby had used. There was always a weird vibe between those too. Kelley's eyebrows shot up. Sydney was trying to take all of the blanket and seemed to miss the comment. She was pulling spare kleenex off the bed.  
  
Hope managed to project a challenge while half undressed just as well as she could on the field. Abby gave her a funny look and then said something about watching too many episodes of _Girls_ and breakfast having a dress code before she backed out of the room.  
  
Carli, who had been not following anything up to that point, finally snapped. "A joke has to be funny!" She stalked out the direction Abby had gone. Breakfast was going to be interesting.  
  
"They aren't morning people like us," Syd announced. So maybe she had been half paying attention. With Syd you never knew.  
  
"Off, both of you. I'm going to have to talk to Carli," Hope said loudly and then mouthed, "About what?" in Kelley's direction. Kelley merely shrugged. 


End file.
